In 2018, author Omar Tyree celebrated the 25th anniversary of his classic novel Flyy Girl. I was excited that he agreed to be interviewed on our podcast to celebrate this momentous occasion.

In the Black literary space, Omar Tyree was a demigod, he had accomplished what many Black writers in the 90s wanted to do… make the New York Times Best Seller list. Tyree also won an NAACP Image Award and has penned over 30 books.

So you can imagine how excited I was to interview the man who gave me one of my childhood fictional crushes. Note: I was about 11 or 12 when I read Flyy Girl, my prefrontal cortex hadn’t fully developed.

I was basking in nostalgia mixed with fuzzy memories of fictional characters I hadn’t revisited since childhood. The goal for the interview was simple, talk about Flyy Girl and celebrate a Black author who had accomplished so much during his era.

However, (to my surprise) I didn’t get a jovial Tyree who wanted to discuss his past work, I got a disgruntled adult who wanted to talk about why his books didn’t become movies. I didn’t take it personally because Hollywood is hard and Black creatives have it ten times as hard when trying to get their work out there.

What stopped me in my tracks was when he began speaking about Black women. There was an obvious undertone of correction against Black women that had been soaking in misogyny for years under the guise of fictional writing and it had found my platform to rear its ugly head.

I overlooked it because of who he was and gave him the “Unc pass.” What’s the Unc pass? A pass many Black women give disrespectful older Black men in our community. Unc is the stereotypical old head who says harmful things about Black women and gets away with it because, “man he’s Unc, he don’t mean no harm.”

The truth? His words are harmful to the Black community and should be called out. Author, dramatist, folklorist, and all-around badass, Zora Neale Hurston said, “If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.”

Being a Black woman in America, there is a fine line I teeter when the person causing harm to Black women is a Black man. Do I give him the Unc pass and move on? Do I roll my eyes and allow time to pass so I can forget? Or do I flip tables over like Jesus did when he found out there were money changers and merchants in the temple?

In 2018 when I interviewed Tyree I gave him the Unc pass, rolled my eyes, and moved on. I didn’t want to ruffle feathers, and I didn’t want the stigma of being “another Black woman who talked down to a successful Black man.”

I pride myself on helping to create spaces where we honor Black authors and create safe spaces for our Black women readers.

But what happens when that space has been compromised? No longer deemed safe, and the perpetrator is Black and a man?

Why should any Black woman in the literary community have to hold space for someone who openly disparages Black women? The answer can no longer be, “Because we are all Black.”

Tyree came on a Black woman’s podcast, (her metaphorical temple) and disparaged Black women and men (unprovoked) to sell Black women his books.

In 2025…

As a guest on the Black Girl Tired Book Talk Podcast, Tyree was supposed to discuss Flyy Girl, its new cover, and introduce the classic novel to a new generation of readers and send old ones down memory lane smiling about what once was. None of that happened.

For almost two hours (1:53:05 to be exact), I watched as Storm (the host) did her best to interview him and keep it book-related. At the 20-minute mark, Tyree goes on a rant about how social media only serves women in bathing suits.

“All they do is take swimsuit pictures and they get a million followers.” He went on, “Naturally a woman’s curves is attracted to a male because we are biologically prone to go into women. Because when your curves develop that says to a man, now she’s ready for procreation. That is the natural habit of humans.”

And now, I’m talking directly to you, Omar.

Do you know how harmful that statement is?

Do you know who suffers from adultification bias the most? Black girls. You said when a girl develops curves that says to a man she’s ready for procreation. Do you know how many young Black girls have to deal with grown men believing that because they are curvy they are ready for procreation?

What you said is harmful to Black women and girls and none of us should have to deal with or accept it because you’re Unc.

I’m not done…

Storm asked (31:15 mark) how you see the themes from your book resonating with the new generation. Instead of talking about the characters and how they related to the times we are in now, your first thought was to gloat about how you are a self-proclaimed seer who foreshadowed how Black women would end up in 2025.

“Now let’s go ten years after when she hit 30-something. If she ain’t already married, and she already been a boss in her 20s, now she’s like, ‘I ain’t got time for none of these OOOP n-words out here talking this, talking that’ Now, she’s a single boss lady with boss lady attitude. Can’t accept no man. And you see how my personality is. I’m not gon’ be carrying your bags and holding doors for you like I’m some butler. I’m still a man. If you can’t respect a dominant man now, ‘cause you got your own money, and you can do bad yourself or good by yourself, you gon’ end up with children and no husband. And no. And this is— When you look at it, I’m like ‘Wow’ ‘cause when I wrote it, I wasn’t thinking about looking at and future would map out. Now, I’m hearing so many sisters talking ‘bout, ‘I ain’t got no time for the men.'”

And even after all of that, you stated that there are 73% of single-mother households in the Black community. That is a lie. You went to school for journalism and you’re making up statistics to feed your argument, stop it.

And not even a second after that inaccuracy you go on another long rant about Black women being less submissive than Asian and White women… deep negro sigh.

“When you talk about Asian women, they understand how to be with a man. And then you talk about white women, Black women say it all the time, ‘them white girls are submissive.'”

I’ll direct you to the 4b movement.

And to wrap that segment up in a bow you spoke about Black women being too dominant, and said Black men wouldn’t put up with us. You then inserted your mother into the interview to use as a reference.

Now, I don’t know your mother, but she’s a Black woman and my elder so I would never disrespect her.

After hearing snippets of her life story (through your recollection of events) I’ve concluded that she was not a dominant woman. She was a Black woman doing her best in an environment where roses aren’t watered but expected to bloom.

Your mother adapted. Throughout the interview, you referenced her a lot without showcasing the fullness of her humanity.

Your description of her was a hard-working dominant woman. As a Black woman, I’m telling you that’s not even hitting the surface of who she is. You gave her the strong Black woman archetype, and that has spilled over into how you view many Black women.

And even after Storm did her best to tell you that all Black women aren’t the same you held onto your way of thinking. She gave example after example, and I fear your thoughts on Black women didn’t change. You’re so used to being Unc and having everyone gloss over your harmful ways that this was just another conversation.

You deem yourself a “real man” who will never bow down or even hold the door open for a woman. But it’s women, (specifically Black women) who you want to use for labor when promoting your work.

Throughout the interview, you spoke highly of Toni Morrison and Alice Walker, and I wondered if you understood these authors and their work.

Alice Walker is a womanist who wrote The Color Purple. You will puff out your chest and say, “I know what she wrote,” I’m here to tell you that you don’t.

Toni Morrison said, “I didn’t want to speak for Black people and I wanted to speak to, and to be among them… it’s us. So the first thing I had to do was to eliminate the white gaze.” From the documentary film Toni Morrison: The Pieces I Am.

Who are you speaking to when you write? And if it’s Black women, why are you hellbent on putting us down while negatively comparing us to Asian and White women?

At the 46:21 mark in the interview, you asked Storm if she believes all women are bosses. Your goal with that question was to get her to say no so you could humble Black women.

Are all Black women bosses?

 Black women are the most educated group in the United States. Although we make up less than 10% of the U.S. population, we are the fastest-growing group of entrepreneurs.

And since 47% of Black women are head of household, caring for their children with no help from the other parent, while also holding down full-time jobs, along with enduring misogynoir, while simultaneously being charged with saving America, I’d say we are all bosses.

Do you know what ignorance does, Omar?

It leads you to believe that because you were a pioneer in one era you are a pioneer in all eras.

It allows your misogyny to fester and spill over during an interview where instead of talking about your book, (which after listening for almost two hours a new reader who doesn’t know you still would have no clue what it’s about) you belittle Black women on a Black woman run platform aimed at celebrating Black authors.

It is your ignorance paired with your arrogance and lack of journalism skills that you would say over 70% of Black households only have single mothers.

You also stated (with your entire chest) that “Black men don’t read fiction outside of the ones in jail because now they have time on their hands.”

This type of thinking doesn’t happen overnight, this is years in the making.

Even after all of this, I fear I haven’t moved the needle, and you won’t see the error of your ways. You will continue promoting Flyy Girl while urging the community to “come together and not be divided by hot takes.”

You’ll use the current political climate to placate Black women into forgetting what you said, because, “we gotta stick together.”

And some Black women will go along with it because that’s just Unc, and he doesn’t mean any harm.

When you have harmed Black women, how does one rectify that? Is it by apologizing and then never speaking on the subject again? Outside of “my bad,” or “I meant no disrespect,” how do you know if anything has changed?

Has the person done the work to change?

What does the work look like? Is it going to therapy? Is it talking to Black women to listen with an open heart and mind to gain understanding? Is it reading books by Black women who have the range to speak in-depth about the issues we face?

While there is no single solution, there has to be more than a quick “I’m sorry,” post on social media because you want us to support your endeavors. And this is not just for you Omar but for anyone who disparages Black women while also demanding our labor, time, and resources.

Omar, get a marketing team and a publicist. Stop listening to podcasters and talk to people outside the echo chamber you’ve built, which enabled this negative rhetoric against Black women.

Instead of tapping into the side of social media where women are wearing bathing suits, tap into the side that celebrates and supports Black authors–we’re right here.

You have used the fruit of your labor in the 90s to win over the hearts of some today. And you should be celebrated because you are a pioneer. But it cannot be under the condition that Black women be demeaned and made to feel inadequate.

So I’m tearing up the Unc pass and rejecting the notion that you don’t mean harm. Your words have caused harm to Black women and girls, now it’s up to you to fix it.

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